Dragon Ball FU Returns!
by Sassy-Chan The Hyper Freak
Summary: READ MY INSANE DBZ STORY!! 5 Outta 4 Mental Paients agree, that it's the best thing since the last best thing!! Go on read it...I don't bite....MWHAHAHAHAHA!
1. Default Chapter

Dragonball FU Returns!  
  
By: Sassy Saiyan Princess *Yep! Thats me!*  
  
Chapter 1: Sassy's Back in Town!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or any anime or other shows, just my own crappy crap. You wanna sue me? Well fine! Thats what your gonna get my crappy crap! Want it? WELL TAKE IT BICTHES!! *throws her crap* and I hope an old man spits in your ham!!  
  
I'm Baaaaaaaaack! How have you been my lil bundles of evil? Did you miss me, I sure missed you! I can't believe you guys! I didn't know there were so many insane people like me out there!  
  
It was a fucked up day in DBZ land once again, The fish were dancing, the Bluejays were screwing the Robins, and the sun was about to explode, old people were beating up Subway employees with beavers, and some guy just threw up on the sidewalk until a shrill angry voice broke the beautiful scene. "ARGH! I'm gonna fucking kill you!!" screamed Pan. "Screw you bitch!" screamed Bulma. "Screw this hoe!" said Bra as she threw some pink powder on Bulma and truned her into the most horrible, disgusting eviliest evil in all the world. She turned Bulma into a......STAR TREK FAN!! "What's that!?" A clueless reader asked. "Oh! You don't know!? Allow me to explain..." exclaimed Sassy as she grabbed her Umbrella and flew down to the ground "Wheeeeee! Mary Poppins eat your heart out you dirty whore of evil!"  
  
Sassy: Hello readers!  
  
Readers: HEY SASSY!  
  
Sassy: I'm here to tell you what a Star Trek Fan is in my book *holds up Sassy's Book of Losers*  
  
Readers: *Oohs and Ahhs*  
  
Sassy: Yes...I know the book is very sexy...it turns you on, No? *turns to a page in her book and starts reading* A Star Trek Fan is Fat.....  
  
Readers: *boo and hiss*  
  
Sassy: I know....so much fat in the world today...*continues reading* Star Trek Fans are fat and love Star Trek/Star Wars among other old super hero comics. Even tho they are at least in there mid 30s they still live with there mom, have poor hygine and a diet consist of nothing but fast food and or TV dinners breakfast lunch and dinner. They refuse to have any other contact with the outside world, they get extreme plessure form beating each other in both role playing and online games and wet dreams about female super heros. (Wonder Woman, Princess Lalya, Agent Scully.ect) Also they enjoy talking to the creators of their prized possesions telling them about the shit they did wrong and how it could have been better. *closes book* and that my friends is a Star Trek fan!  
  
Readers: *stand up and clap* YAAAAAY!!!  
  
Sassy: Now dearies.....On with the fic....  
  
Bulma grew fatter and fatter and fatter then...................BBBBBOOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!!!! Then Pan gathered up all of the Bulma Chunks and fed them to the Homeless ending World Hunger. (Awwwww.....) "I want Banana Soup!" said Batman. "Gee Wiz, Batman!" said Robin. "I can teach you how to make some and-" "I CAN DO IT MYSELF!!growl" Batman snarled while he foamed at the mouth then he grabbed a spoon and pulled down Robin's pants. "TIME FOR YOU PUNISHMENT!!" he yelled as he stabbed the spoon up his butt and fucked him with it! "AHHH!" Robin screamed. (No, Really!) "SAY IT!! SAY BURITTO!!!" Batman yelled. "UHHHH!! BURITTO!! BURITTO!!!" Robin yelled. DAMN RIGHT BITCH!" said Batman. "Hey you flithy fucking slut how would you a taste of this!?" said Hamtaro the Hamster. (0_0!) "Me?" said Bra. "Yeah you, Shit for brains, I was sick of fucking that Bijhou and Penolope sluts and I saw you, hmmm nice ass!" "Ummmmm....Arn't you too small?...." she said. "INSULT MY PENIS!!?? DAMN YOU WHORES!! YOUR WHORES!! WHAT DO CARE?? YOUR JUST LOOKING FOR A SCREW!!" he screamed and jumped on Bra's face and raped her, raped her like a peice of toast. Vegeta was drunk and Krillen was a frog. "Damn, I wish I had some Banana Soup...." whined Goku. "Then make some you fucking doche bag!" Vegeta spat. "Vegeta....I'm......I'm a.....Crossdresser!" Goku said as he ripped of his orange gi and was wearing a tight pink shirt and mini skirt. "WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?! Why the hell would you tell me that!?!?" Vegeta screamed. "Vegeta, I'm in love with clowns your just gonna have to except that..." he cried and then ran off to screw a clown. "Oh my god....This fic is gonna get fucking scary...."muttered Vegeta. "Come to me lover bitch..." said the clown in a low, spooky, seducing voice. "Yes, my honey pot I obey your demands..." said Goku then he and the Clown began to french kiss, Goku got soooo horney for the clown he started licking off his facepaint. "Uhhh....taste like pea soup...." he moaned, as the Clown grabbed Goku's ass. ( ^@^~ Look! I made a piggy! ) "Yeah...mold me like play doh....." The clown slowly took his clothes off with his teeth. "Holy shit....I think the writer of this fic lost what lil sanity she had left....." said Andriod #17 "I'm never going to the circus again......." said #18. "Hey, lets sing the Weird Ass Insane Song!" said Fat Buu. "It gose like this." he said as weird Techno Music started playing "Oink, Oink Sexy Cow! Oink, Oink Sexy Cow! Oink, Oink Sexy Cow! Oink, Oink Sexy Cow! Oink, Oink Sexy Cow! Oink, Oink Sexy Cow! and on and on and on..................." Remember Kids: After you fuck a tree, be sure to fuck a bush to so it dosen't feel left out.......Nature is your friend.....  
  
THE END!!!!  
  
Did that clown thing scare you!? HAHAHA! It scared the fuck outta me and I was the one writting it!! Reveiw and encourage me or no more insanity for you!!! Mwhahahahahahahahahaha!!! *truns to her dead horse* Now eat your peas damnit!!! I said eat your fucking peas!!! Granpappy, he no eat peas!!!! NO EAT PEAS!!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! *gasp* I'VE GOT IT! I'll make a fic about My Lil Ponies raping each other then they all die and get blown up The End! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! It's perfectly evil.....hehehehehe........ 


	2. Sassy FAQ!

~Here's Sassy's F.A.Q~  
  
Question 1: Where the hell have you been it's been like....half a year!?  
  
Sassy: Well......My mom and me got in a fight, I said some pretty mean stuff and she took the computer and destroyed it, but she bought a new one with her taxes....  
  
Question 2: Where do you come up with the stuff that you write!?  
  
Sassy: Me and my friends make it up....cause were both equally insane and have no time on our hands......That and Jhonen Vasquez is a big role model...if you don't know who he is, we hate you and that he is freaky comic artist  
  
Question 3: How old are you?  
  
Sassy: 15 and I'm taking driver's training....MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! CLEAR THE ROAD!! I'm gonna run over some pre-skoolers, don't worry I'll hit the kid that eats paste...Glue is for sniffing not eatting.....   
  
Question 4: Are you always weird and hyper like this!?  
  
Sassy: Yeah, I've always been weird like this ever since I was little or so my mom says....that and I have ADD and ADHD...I have to take Ritalin, Azerta, and Focus......No pill can stop me or keep me crazy!!!!!!   
  
Question 5: Do your parents accept this behavior as......normal......*readers trying to picture Sassy normal but can't*  
  
Sassy: No, they disowned me a loooong time ago....Hahahahaha...Just Kidding, My mom accepts most of it as normal but she dose give me certain looks when where out in public and I start acting nuts, as for my dad I don't see him and I'd rather not talk about him.....(Please absoultey NO questions about Sassy's Daddy.....)  
  
Question 6: Do your friends act like you too?  
  
Sassy: A couple of my friends do. And some don't act as weird but there used to it. But no matter what my friends think, Me and Sunny are the craziest of the group! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! YAAAAY CRAZY!!!!  
  
Question 7: Your pretty wild at times, I bet you piss alot of people at Skool off huh?  
  
Sassy: Oh yeah...theres alot of depressed/always P.Oed kids at skool who think mine and my friends personailtys are really annoying....But we know we are....we just don't care, what they think cause there the ones that will live a boring unfulfilled future if they keep behaving the way they do, that kinda negative behavior is why adults streotypes teenagers as PMSing, Hormone drivin, Drug Somkin, Sexually Active morons.....*Sassy in a huge red chair (That spins^^) petting a lil puppy plushie* Don't worry my pet, They shall die soon.....very soon.......Mwhahahaha! (God, I just love making evil laughs!!)  
  
Question 8: Do you freak your friends out too?  
  
Sassy: Sometimes I do....They think it's kinda gross if I drop food on the ground (and I always do too....I'm very klutzy....) and pick it up and eat it, but I always yell "It was on the ground for less then 5 seconds!!!" and it's true!   
  
Question 9: Favorite Food?  
  
Sassy: All kinds of Japanese Food!!! Okonomiyaki, Ramen Noodles, Grilled Ika , Chicken Udon, Plum Onigiri, Rice Crackers and Cookies, Pockey, Kappa Rolls and Noriben and wash it all down with some Sake!^^   
  
~Okonomiyaki: Japanese Pizza  
  
Grilled Ika: Grilled Squid  
  
Chicken Udon: Like Ramen noodles but has real chicken and vegetables fish cakes ect.  
  
Plum Onigiri: Rice cake with sour plum in the middle.  
  
Rice Crackers/Cookies: A Cookie or Cracker with a Seaweed on top  
  
Pockey: A lil cookie stick dipped in chocolate also comes in tons of other flavors *One of Japan's most popular snack! Yum!*  
  
Kappa Rolls: Cucumber rolls  
  
Noriben: White Rice with Seaweed on top. *What? It's good! Really it is!*  
  
Question 10: What's your favorite Cereal? *Why ask this?? Some E-mailed me asking this!*  
  
Sassy: Cookie Crisp! One time me and my friends were eating cereal and I started drinking the milk outta the bowl when I suddenly just coughed while drinking it, I coughed most of it back in the bowl and then I drank it again and that grossed my frinds out too....THE END!  
  
Question 11: May I please please please put your story on my webpage!?  
  
Sassy: Sure. But you must E-mail me asking for my permission (if you don't bad stuff will happen soooo much bad stuff will happen you'll say "Whoa, alot of bad stuff just happaned...." as your Ass melts of it's ass) or AIM at AnimeGoth666  
  
  
  
Question 12: What do you look like?  
  
Sassy: I go to a public skool, they make us wear a unifrom, it's cool tho I feel like a real anime girl!  
  
Question 13: What are your hobbies?  
  
Sassy: Anime, Manga, Anime Music and anything else Japanese, Martial Arts, Archery, Kick Boxing, Football, Drawing Anime, Writting Anime Fanfictions, Getting kicked out of stores and malls, Being a klutz (I'm not trying to be tho), Going to the movies, Being weird with my friends and NOT Studying....(Guess, Oh many classes I'm passing!! *cough cough*)  
  
Question 14: What other Fanfictions do you write beside....funny/confusing ones?  
  
Sassy: Anime Lemons! Even tho I'm not of age (and I never had sex *not ashamed to be a Virgin* In your face Madonna!!) But it passes time, plus I admit it, I'm a perv with a pevreted sense of humor (Bet you didn't know that!!) and I'm proud of that!!!.....Hmmmm yep...Umm...yeah......  
  
Question 15: Who are your favorite Anime Lemon couples?  
  
Sassy: Vegeta/Bulma, Inuyasha/Kagome, Kouga/Kagome, Miroku/Sango, Ranma/Akane, Akane/Ryoga, Ranma/Shampoo, Lina/Zelgadis, Sana/Akito, Sakura/Li, Tenchi/Ryoko, Tenchi/Sasami*her as a woman!* and some few crossovers....  
  
Question 14: What do you mean kicked out of stores? *5 people asked me this in my e-mail after I told them my hobbies*  
  
Sassy: *stares blankly at the 5 people, mouth slightly open* ............Me and my friends get ourselves kicked out on propose.......next question......  
  
Question 15: What do you do to get kicked out of stores?  
  
Sassy: *sighs and know she's gonna be on this subject for awhile* Depends on what store I'm in mainly...Mostly it's just running around and screaming, Stalking and asking the Employees and or Shoppers 'personal' questions and annoying them, touching (or breaking) everything your not suppose to touch, Hiding/Vandalizing bathroom stalls and then scaring people who walk in, and walking in the 'Employees Only' Deparment claiming we work there. Immature, Stupid, Pointless yes...it is, But it's Hella Fun!!  
  
OH! this was the one time my friend was crazier then me I gave her five bucks to shit 'on' the toilet seat at K-marts and insted she shit right on floor next to the sinks!!!!! and she left a note that said "Sorry, I seemed to have missed the crapper. My bad!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I gave her 10 bucks after that....that....was pure gold.HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  
  
There you go my most common asked questions anserwed......NOW STOP STALKING ME, WHY CAN'T YOU ALL JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, DAMN YOU PEOPLE AND YOUR CONSENT THRIST FOR MY COMEDY!!! WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! *jumps out window and lands on an old lady, the lady cires out as her hip is broken, but don't worry Sassy is still alive and in good health* ^^! Wheee! Now to run over some children! VROOM VROOM! VRRROOOOOOOOOOM!! BEEP! BEEP! Kill the Furbys!!!!! 


	3. sHMOOOOOOOOOO

New and Improved Dragonball Fucked Up!  
  
By: Sassy the Hyper Freak  
  
Disclaimer: ARGH! I hate these! All they do is lower my self esteem!! NO!!!!!! I DON'T FUCKING OWN DRAGONBALL!!! AND I NEVER WILL!!!!!!! Oh, and Thanks alot, Matt for raping and killing my mouse!! ..........................you bitch.......................:(  
  
~* Before you read my insane writing, I'd like to dedicate this chapter to "Nezumi" my stuffed animal mouse, which I won at a Machine Game, he wasn't even a month old until my bitch of friend "Matt" who declared his haterd of mice, stuck Nezumi in his pants did sexual things to him then ripped his head off, and then threw him in my fish tank. This all happaned as I was writting this chapter, So I dedicate it too him! Good bye Nezumi, Whenever I hear Matt moan in plessure when he humps my desk I'll think of you. Whenever I hear the tearing of fabric I'll think of you. Whenever I have to get my dead fish out of the fish tank cause it's rotting corpse is stuck in the filiter, I'll think of you....*~  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 1: Being a Psycho Hyper Freak is better then a MouseRaping Bitch! (I know I know.....I hold major grudes.....)  
  
"Once a speedofucker, always a speedofucker, I always say! I tell you those fishlickin' sons of bitches don't know the meaning of the words lotion sex!" slurred Vegeta drunk, as a very drunk person. "Yeah, I tell yeah if I had a cow ugly as that guy whore, I'd shave it's ass and tell it to walk backwards!" yelled Goku drunk as a Clownkisser. (Remember he IS a Clownkisser!) "OH MY GOD!" yelled Yamucha as he brusted through the bar doors with his hands down his pants. "My dick is gonna explode........UHHHHHH!!!" "Why?" asked Goku. "Is there too much cum in your cock?"   
  
"NO!" grunted Yamucha "It's filled with....with CHEESE!!!!!!" "Oh....Why Cheese, should it be filled with cum!?" asked Goku. "His mom probley sucked it all out of him when he was 3!" yelled Vegeta. The whole bar broke into laughter as they watched Yamucha's pants grow bigger. "OH GOD!" he screamed "Why!?!? Why did I eat all those Leggo Walffles, Why didn't I just let go, let go of my butt ugly eggo filled with penis enlargement medicine!!??" (Umm...Leggo Walffles coopration please don't sue me, Your walffles arn't butt ugly there very sexy.) But Yamucha's pants just grew and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and then.............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................(Sassy: I'm just building up the suspense here folks, you know what's gonna happan anyway.)........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................   
  
YAMUCHA TURNED INTO A GAINT MEATBALL!!!!! (Sassy: Ha! Bet, you didn't see that coming huh?) "Ooo, Need meat!" as some of the drunk bar files as the jumped off the stools and stalked evily toward the new improved and meaty balley Yamucha. "....meat....." they moaned. Then there hair, flesh and clothes rotted away as they turned into MEAT ZOMBIES!! (Don't worry there pants stayed on.) "NOOOOOOOooooooo" cired Meaty Yamucha as they poucned and ripped his flesh apart. "Awww Crap!" screamed Vegeta as he watched the meat zombies rip aprt Yamucha. "Those bastards got a floatie in my beer." he whined as more yamucha chunks continued to fly threw the air.  
  
OH MY GOD! I just heard on the TNN network for Men was gonna start playing UNCUT episodes of Ren and Stimpy!! I don't know about you but I loved that show!! In honor of the show being back on the air I'm gonna sing the "Happy Happy Joy Joy!" Song! "I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!!" I love that line! When my dad saw the music video to it he was all......"WHAT THE FUCK!? THERE SMACKING THEIR ASSES TOGETHER!!!!"   
  
Ok, this is off subject......more DBZ shit.........  
  
Trunks: Mommy Mommy! When is the pool gonna be ready?  
  
Bulma: Shut up son, and keep pissing!!  
  
Goten: Mommy Mommy! Can I have a bike fer my birthday?  
  
Chi Chi: Shut up son, you already have a wheelchair!  
  
Trunks: Daddy Daddy! What's oral sex?  
  
Vegeta: Shut up son, and keep sucking!  
  
Gohan: Daddy Daddy! Why is mommy running!?  
  
Goku: Shut up son, and give me a bigger gun!  
  
Now these are TRUE hallmark moments.......Merry Family Day, God bless us everyone!  
  
I'm sooooooo sorry I haven't updated but come on....I HAVE A LIFE! Oh I might join the high skool track team, so there won't be that much updating.....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I'm such a bitch.......I'm kidding but I'm not promising anything sooooooooo.........you might wanna take up masterbaiting, just to keep your self busy and if you do it already, you might wanna do it more often......See yeah, I'm gonna go watch Invader ZiM! 


End file.
